Videos

VIDEOS

A Parent’s Guide to Modern Teen Dating

All Fortnited Out 

Build Extraordinary Relationships with Your Tween/Teen Through Daily Conversation – Amy Alamar, EdD

Check Up from the Neck Up with Dr. Chris Bogart

College Transition After The Drop Off! 

Endurance Parenting for Today 

Friendship Matters: Fostering Connections in Childhood 

Healthy Relationships are Learned

Help Your Child Get Organized & Plan Ahead for Success in School with Less Stress 

How to Slay Together with Katherine Wintsch

How to Support Your Kids and Yourself When Dealing with Difficult Topics

How to Talk so Little Kids Will Listen 

Parenting QuaranTEENS into Growing Teens – High School PFA with Andree Palmgreen, LPC

Power and Purpose of Play – Beth O’Briend, Head of Early Childhood, New Canaan Country School

Preschool/Elementary: Positive Discipline 

Raising Humans in a Digital World 

Riding the Roller Coaster of the Adolescent Brain – Ruth A. Potee, MD

Social Skills Guide For Tweens

Staying Calm in the Storm – Julie Hall, MBA, MS LMFT

The Art of Raising Kids Today

The Panini Generation 

The Ups, Downs, and All Arounds of Middle School Friendships with Dr. Lauren Pote

Transition to Kindergarten – NCPS

Under Pressure with Dr. Suniya Luthar

Understanding the Teenage Brain: The Keys to a Positive Relationship 

What to Do With All This Screen Time – Diana Graber

What We Learned Along the Way – High School PFA with Dr. Michelle Albright

Women and Alcohol: A Community Conversation

Winter Survival Isolation Tips

Puberty

PUBERTY, SEX ED, & TEEN RELATIONSHIPS

CARES Programs & Resources

NCHS - PFA General Meeting

This program was an open and honest conversation about modern teen dating. Emma Kate Freatman taught parents what teens wished their parents knew, what misconceptions teens think their parents have, and what questions teens wanted their parents to ask them about their dating lives. Parents left this PFA presentation with tips on how to start the conversation about dating with their teens, and how to keep the conversation going.

The slide deck Emma Kate Freatman used as a visual aid can be downloaded here.

CARES Program, Ann Rodwell-Lawton, MSW from DVCCCT

This program will give you tools to help your child understand: what a healthy relationship looks and feels like, relationship skills including setting boundaries, the importance of healthy communication, and how to identify unhealthy relationships dynamics rooted in power and control.

New Canaan CARES

Do NOT expect your middle schooler to ask you questions about puberty or sexuality, it may NEVER happen! You must open, and continue the series of many conversations. There is no such thing as starting the conversation too early.
There is age-appropriate information to share with your child – and remember that each child will be ready at a different age to receive it – and often in a different way.

New Canaan CARES

A chart to help you as a parent understand the pubescent development of your child. Every child develops differently – with some genetic consistencies.

New Canaan CARES

Teens are doing their job as we as parents do ours – their brain is ill-equipped to do the planning without support from an adult – but is perfectly suited for innovating, social cuing, and learning.

Additional Resources

Beat Seat Studios

Would you like a cup of tea?

Child Mind Institute

It’s important for parents to tell kids it’s not okay to pressure someone into going farther than they are ready for. And no one should feel they need to give in to pressure, either from a partner or from friends, to have sex if they’re not ready.

The Washington Post

Kids have five core needs when it comes to sexuality, Roffman explains. They need affirmation and unconditional love; information about healthy and unhealthy behaviors; clarity about values such as respect and integrity; appropriate boundaries and limits; and guidance about making responsible, safe choices.

KidsHealth.org

Going through puberty early also can be hard for kids emotionally and socially. Girls with precocious puberty, for example, may be confused or embarrassed about getting their periods or having enlarged breasts well before any of their peers. They may be treated differently because they look older. Boys can become more aggressive and also develop a sex drive inappropriate for their age.

HealthyChildren.org

There are many opportunities during this time of life for you to talk to your child about what she’s experiencing. Your child needs to understand the phys­ical changes that will occur in her body during puberty.

KidsHealth.org

Kids see and hear a lot about sex and relationships on TV and online. By the time they near puberty, they may be familiar with some advanced ideas. But talking about puberty is still an important job for parents because not all this other information is reliable.

KidsHealth.org

Kids see and hear a lot about sex and relationships on TV and online. By the time they near puberty, they may be familiar with some advanced ideas. But talking about puberty is still an important job for parents because not all this other information is reliable.

Psychology Today

Too many parents wait for the “right” time to come along for the talk, only to find that it never does—and then they don’t have the talk at all, or it only happens after their kid has already become sexually active, which is obviously too late. By starting when they’re young, you have a chance to ease into things and make sure your child has the information they need when they need it.

U.S. News - Health

We know that girls who go through puberty early are more likely to experience various medical and psychological problems, such as depression, obesity, eating disorders and even cancer when they’re older.

Child Mind Institute

Teenagers can be prickly about their privacy, especially when it comes to something as intimate as romance. The potential for embarrassment all around can prevent us from giving them any advice for having healthy and happy relationships. Teenagers do look to us for guidance, though—even when they’d rather die than acknowledge that they are—and we can often have more influence than we realize.

Nutrition

NUTRITION AND HEALTH

CARES Programs & Resources

New Canaan CARES, Jill Castle

Feeding children is not easy! Keep these simple tips in mind so that your child is well-nourished and ready to learn.

Additional Resources

Silver Hill Hospital

You probably have heard the expression “you are what you eat.” Certain foods are key components in the manufacture of powerful brain chemicals, called neurotransmitters. Neurotransmitters such as serotonin, dopamine, and norepinephrine may jog your memory, improve performance, improve
sleep and boost your mood.

Mayo Clinic

Nutrition for kids is based on the same principles as nutrition for adults. Everyone needs the same types of nutrients — such as vitamins, minerals, carbohydrates, protein and fat. Children, however, need different amounts of specific nutrients at different ages. So what’s the best formula to fuel your child’s growth and development?

Body Image

BODY IMAGE & EATING DISORDERS

National Eating Disorders Association

People with negative body image have a greater likelihood of developing an eating disorder and are more likely to suffer from feelings of depression, isolation, low self-esteem, and obsessions with weight loss.

National Eating Disorders Collaboration

Body image is a combination of the thoughts and feelings that you have about your body. Body image may range between positive and negative experiences, and one person may feel at different times positive or negative or a combination of both.

National Eating Disorders Assocation

Addressing body image or eating problems in their beginning stages offers your friend the best chance for working through these issues and becoming healthy again. Don’t wait until the situation is so severe that your friend’s life is in danger. Your friend needs a great deal of support and understanding.

Screenagers

SCREENAGERS & INTERNET SAFETY

CARES Programs & Resources

Are You Smarter Than Your Cell Phone?

CARES Program, featuring Dr. Frank Bartolomeo, Ph.D., LCSW, Silver Hill Hospital

Dr. Frank Bartolomeo discusses how to talk to your teenager about social media, and how to gain insight into your child’s experience, mood, and interaction with others in the digital world.

Dr. Bartolomeo’s slides can be downloaded here. You can also download the rack card handed out at the program here.

Additional Resources:

#DetoxYourFeed with the Dove Self-Esteem Project

Trailer for Fake Famous on Netflix

CARES Program, Elizabeth Ortiz-Schwartz, MD

Research has shown that in general, one hour and no more than three hours per day, can result in an adequate degree of happiness and adjustment. 

CARES Program

How much is too video gaming? Video games are becoming an increasingly pressing issue as they consume more and more of kids’ time and attention. Hear from experts in the field and a young adult who struggled with video game overuse.

CARES Program, author Diana Graber

Middle and High School parents will learn how to help their children use the digital world wisely. Leave with resources to help your child build a healthy relationship with technology. Topics will include safety concerns and online reputation.

CARES Program, author Diana Graber

We are all using the internet and social media so much more now. Author Diana Graber will advise parents on how best to handle the increased screen time in this current climate, guide them on how to set limits when screens are the only way to connect and address parents’ worries about how families will get back to screen time limits once life returns to normal.

CARES Program, Jake Kircher

The three rules of social media: (1) everything posted online is public, (2) there’s no such thing as anonymity online, only perceived anonymity, (3) there’s no such thing as online privacy, only perceived online privacy.

Additional Resources

ScreenagersMovie.com

Here are some unique gift ideas for the holidays to help promote off-screen time for kids and teens!

ScreenagersMovie.com

Almost 40% of youth and teens with mobile devices in their room report that they wake up and check it at least once a night. Teens who use social media longer than three hours a day were more likely to report going to bed after 11 pm and waking up during the night.

ScreenagersMovie.com

Many teens who play a lot of video games also have happy, full lives—being social offline, doing other things for the challenge that lets them build needed self-competence, family time, and much more. When kids and teens have lots going on off the screen, it is a great sign of mental wellbeing! Yet, many hours on video games can be a red flag when there is very little happening outside of game time. Are they experiencing stressors offline for which gaming is an escape?

ScreenagersMovie.com

“No matter what is happening with my kids’ time on screens — including exposure to yucky stuff like upsetting media, unappealing role models, manipulative ads, and on and on — I know that my immediate family, our extended family, and friends, are often modeling and talking about positive values. And those values seep into my kids and will guide them through life.”

ScreenagersMovie.com

Forty percent of teens say that most school nights they get less than seven hours of sleep and there’s a strong association between more screen time and less sleep. Since 2012, when the prevalence of teens owning smartphones started to increase, the number of hours teens sleep has steeply decreased

ScreenagersMovie.com

Apple’s operating system iOS 12 introduced Screen Time, a feature parents have been waiting for. With it, we have a new tool to help prevent excessive screen time for our youth, as well as ourselves.

ScreenagersMovie.com

Here are some apps, websites, and articles about screen time and internet safety.

CommonSenseMedia.org

Common Sense has been the leading source of entertainment and technology recommendations for families and schools. Every day, millions of parents and educators trust Common Sense reviews and advice to help them navigate the digital world with their kids. Together with policymakers, industry leaders, and global media partners, we’re building a digital world that works better for all kids, their families, and their communities.

Add Your Heading Text Here

Using technology is an exciting privilege, but it is also a huge responsibility. This agreement is to help parents and teenagers discuss how to use technology safely and wisely.

Child Mind Institute

Your child might be embarrassed to tell you if they’re being cyberbullied. Or they might be afraid you’ll make it worse. But if you find out it’s happening, it’s serious enough to do something about it.

RaisingDigitalNatives.com

Maybe your child came home from the first day of 6th grade saying that everyone else has a phone, or your fourth grader had a sleep-over and claims that all of the other kids have better gaming systems, or your seventh grader is the last one not posting on Tik Tok. Is the “everyone else” factor ever important to consider? What if the “everyone else” factor is all about waiting until a certain age for access and your independent and responsible kid is ready now?

Family Online Safety Institute

Need help talking with your kids about online safety? Want to know about parental controls? Looking for a simple set of rules to use with your children? FOSI’s Good Digital Parenting provides you with videos, tip sheets, resources, blogs, and more.

YourTeenMag.com

Teens have become accustomed to the ubiquitous presence of digital media, which they rely on for connection, engagement, and entertainment—even when they are supposed to be sleeping. New research suggests that constant connection, especially when devices are in the bedroom, can have more serious effects that we may have anticipated.

Child Mind Institute

The vast majority of children and adolescents in the United States play video games. Although many children play them in moderation, without adverse consequences, others become obsessed with gaming. Parents may become worried when a child is neglecting homework to play games, or is staying up all night gaming and is too tired to get up for school the next day.

Fox 61 News

Dr. Amy Alamar has worked in the field of education as a teacher, teacher educator, researcher, parent educator, and education reformer for over fifteen years. She has conducted significant research in the areas of student stress, parent involvement, learning and instruction, curriculum design and implementation, and using reflective practice to support engagement and communication. Watch Dr. Alamar on Fox 61 News talk about kids and gaming disorders.

ScreenagersMovie.com

Saying no and being able to tolerate the myriad of emotions that result, such as guilt, self-doubt, and sadness is challenging for many people. On top of that, the child may add on their own negative emotions to the “no,” such as anger and disgust. Having to tolerate any one of these emotions, let alone several of them at one time, is a major undertaking.

ABC News

For some parents, understanding the pressure of social media can be difficult, and as a result, some teens may feel they cannot talk to their parents about cyberbullying, body image problems and other struggles they face in their day-to-day life.

Cyberwise

Teens seem to add new words to their vocabulary every other day, and many of these are used online. Here’s a handy list to help you!

ScreenagersMovie.com

Violent games, even non-gory ones like Fortnite, warrant conversations with our youth. Parents need to decide if they will allow such games in the home. Whatever decision is made, the rationale behind the decision should be shared with the kids. It sounds easy, but it can be tricky to verbalize these kinds of thoughts around our kids. Hearing our kids’ and teens’ input is also crucial. We want them to have chances to talk about all of this.

MediaGirls.org

TikTok videos are 15 seconds to 3 minutes long. An attractive aspect of the app is that it allows users to collaborate with each other. Users and their friends can make their videos together, adding another social feature to the app that Vine didn’t offer. The app’s user base, 50% of which being between the ages of 13-24, have created makeup application videos, adventurous challenges like these and self-deprecating skits about social awkwardness, mental health, etc. set to music.

Internet Safety 101

Internet Safety 101® is a digitally-based internet safety resource designed to educate, equip and empower parents, educators and other adults with the knowledge and resources needed to protect children from Internet dangers including pornography, predators, cyberbullies and threats related to online gaming, social networking and mobile devices.

Internet Safety

Vaping

VAPING

CARES Programs & Resources

New Canaan CARES, Communities 4 Action, Daydream Communications

A child who gets through age 21 without smoking, using illegal drugs or abusing
alcohol is virtually certain never to do so.

Additional Resources

NBC News

Smoking e-cigarettes delivers cancer-causing chemicals that get into the body — and popular fruity flavors appear to be the worst. Teenagers who try vaping may be poisoning themselves with many of the same chemicals that make traditional cigarettes so deadly.

Today News

A creative new campaign is hoping to treat teenagers addicted to vaping, which the FDA now says is an epidemic. NBC’s Cynthia McFadden takes a look at how the Truth Initiative, known for its powerful anti-smoking ads, is turning its attention to e-cigs.

UT Southwestern Medical Center

People who feel supported are more likely to quit vaping or smoking for good.

Partnership to End Addiction

We break down what vaping is, why it appeals to youth, what the health risks are and what you can do to protect young people from its harms.

LifeHacker

Among teens, e-cigarettes are more popular than traditional cigarettes, and the Juul brand is currently king

Surgeon General

A more natural discussion will increase the likelihood that your teen will listen. Rather than saying “we need to talk,” you might ask your teen what he or she thinks about a situation you witness together.

Child Mind Institute

Vaping has gotten much more popular among teenagers in the past few years. Now, many more teenagers use e-cigarettes, like the brand JUUL, than traditional cigarettes. There are restrictions on the sale and advertising of e-cigarettes to young people, but many teenagers still use them.

Your Teen Magazine

Juuling leads to nicotine addiction that will have dangerous long term consequences. When we consider the number of teens who have been drawn into vaping, we are basically dealing with a new generation of smokers.

Silver Hill Hospital

Episode 13 of Straight Talk with Tracey focuses on the big topic of Vaping and Adolescence with distinguished guests Denique Weidema-Lewis, Director of Prevention at Positive Directions and New Canaan Police Officer, Jeff Deak.

Death/Grief/Loss

DEATH/GRIEF/LOSS

CARES Programs & Resources

CARES Program, Julie Hall, MBA, MS LMFT

Explore ways to navigate grief. Learn practical ways you and your child can manage anxiety and fear. Discuss the importance of self-care. A recording of this program can be viewed here.

VIDEO: How to Support Your Kids and Yourself When Dealing with Difficult Topics

CARES Program, Tracey Masella, LCSW and Frank Bartolomeo, PhD

Tips and a guided discussion on supporting yourself and your kids when dealing with difficult topics. A recording of this program can be viewed here.

Additional Resources

Child Mind Institute

In the wake of a traumatic event, your comfort, support and reassurance can make children feel safe, help them manage their fears, guide them through their grief, and help them recover in a healthy way.

Child Mind Institute

The year after a loved one has died is especially hard. The first Thanksgiving, Mother’s Day or special event like a graduation can make kids feel sad. You may think the best idea is to skip the celebration. But skipping it can sometimes make kids feel even worse. Thinking and planning ahead can make these hard days easier and even bring some joy to them.

American Psychological Association

Children’s lives are touched by trauma on a regular basis, no matter how much parents or teachers try to keep the “bad things” away. Instead of shielding children from the dangers, violence or tragedies around us, adults should talk to kids about what is happening. The conversation may not seem easy, but taking a proactive stance, discussing difficult events in age-appropriate language can help a child feel safer and more secure.

The Dougy Center - The National Center for Grieving Children and Families

When someone dies, it can feel like you’re alone in your grief. At Dougy Center, you will find support, resources, and connection before and after a death

The Dougy Center, National Alliance for Children's Grief

The Dougy Center and the National Alliance for Children’s Grief answer your frequently asked questions about grief and loss.

The Dougy Center

Grief is confusing, both for those grieving and for those who care about them. It can feel awkward, scary, uncomfortable, confusing, and surreal. Just as you might not know what to do or say, people who are grieving often aren’t sure what they need

National Alliance for Grieving Children

If you are raising or caring for a child or teen who has experienced a death, you may wonder how to share this news with them. It is perfectly natural to feel nervous or even fearful of talking with a child about this emotional topic!

The Dougy Center

If you know a child who has experienced a death, you might be wondering, “How can I help?” Here are a few basic principles to keep in mind.

The Dougy Center

If you know a teen who has experienced a death, you might be wondering, “How can I help?” Your willingness to listen to their concerns and questions, as well as be present with their thoughts and feelings, creates a foundation of safety, trust, and support.

Depression/Suicide

DEPRESSION/SUICIDE

988 - The Suicide and Crisis Lifeline in the United States

The 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline (formerly known as the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline) is a network of more than 200 state and local call centers funded by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. 988 Contact Center services include rapid 24/7 access to trained crisis contact center staff who can help people experiencing suicidal, substance use and other mental health crises, provide referrals to resources, and perform warm transfers to mobile crisis services or emergency services as needed/desired. Studies have shown that after speaking with a trained crisis counselor, most people served by the Lifeline are significantly more likely to feel less depressed, less suicidal, less overwhelmed and more hopeful. 

American Association of Suicidology

Mental health, non-suicidal self-harm, and suicide themes on social media continue to be an issue both youth and adults face on a daily basis. Experts recognize that youth engagement with social media includes positive and negative aspects and our goal is to help maximize the benefits while reducing any potential harm. Parents need to have tools for these conversations.

American Foundation for Suicide Prevention

As a parent, you can approach suicide prevention in the same way you do other safety or health issues for your children. By educating yourself, you can learn what puts kids at greatest risk for suicide – and what protects them most strongly.

Child Mind Institute

If you think your child might be feeling suicidal, talk with them about it. Sometimes people are afraid that if they bring it up, it will make the child more likely to attempt suicide, but that’s not true. Showing your child that they have someone safe to talk to makes them feel understood.

World Health Organization

Communities can play a critical role in suicide prevention. They can provide social support to vulnerable individuals and engage in follow-up care, fight stigma and support those bereaved by suicide. They can help give individuals a sense of belonging and a feeling of connectedness by being part of a community. Lastly, communities can also implement specific suicide prevention strategies relevant to their situation.

Today

How parents address suicide with their children varies by age. The American Academy of Pediatrics and the American Psychiatric Association recommend that parents do not talk about tragedies until children are 8 years old. Parents shouldn’t avoid this conversation just because it is tough. It is incredibly important because of the stigma around mental health; it is a reason people give for not getting help.